I almost called
I punched the numbers
It rang once
I disconnected
I could not stand the pain
Of hearing your voice.

What if you had answered?

And so
I turn off the phone
Friends will call
I would have to say
"It's over"
"My life is in the toilet."

I give the phone
A decent burial
Under a pile of blankets
Where I will not see it.

The message machine
Sound turned off
Hidden behind a pile of books
It's blinking eye
Mocks me.