I've got a tiny few Christmas ones from here. We had a tree and he got goodies. Christmas was never a good time for me. I didn't expect it to get any better and except for getting to watch Tommy enjoy the day so much I was still always dreading the day.

Just before Christmas the plant had a big party. Tom told me he had to go but it was only for employees not their families. Sometime in the next few days somebody came over, maybe his brother and asked me how come I didn't come to the party. I said, "I thought it was for employees only?"

He gave me a shocked look and said it was for all the families. So then I knew that Tom was ashamed of me. It hurt and I'm sure that hurt festered inside no matter how much I tried to let it go.

In the years to come, I came to ignore it all and just concentrate on Tommy and making him the happiest kid in the world. It worked for most of the years.

I will never know what changed him so drastically. His Mom wrote to me when I was in New York. She told me she couldn't understand it either. She said it was like the gypsies came in and stole her son in the night and left a fake one in his place. Today, we would say aliens stole him and put a clone in his place.

I always got him something for Christmas. I think he may have gotten me three presents that I can remember. The first was the camera in Hawaii. The next was something I really did want. I forgave him a lot for all the other years when he gave me a typewriter. I thought it was a good omen.

The next year he did get me another present but I don't believe he ever got me one after that. Maybe he could see on my face how disgusted I was. He got me a three pack of kitchen towels and a toaster. If any guy is reading this, never get a woman no matter if she's your wife, mom or girlfriend, kitchen things or things to clean with. It is worse than getting her nothing. Its telling her she's only worth doing the cooking and cleaning.

Today, there is not much anyone can get me. I can't eat candy and I don't like to kill flowers by cutting them, so that's out. I don't wear sexy nighties so that's out. I get all my own books. To be honest, I don't know as there is a guy out there who could pick out a book for someone else unless he really knew that person well. I don't use perfume often either.

I keep telling my sister Sue not to get me anything because I have all I want.

So back to the photos of that cute kid.

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